Many women, especially those in the 40s and above, around the world still can’t get over the love shared in Crash Landing On You. It’s a highly successful romantic comedy KDrama series aired on Netlix top-billed by Hyun Bin and Son Ye-jin. After reading so many Chinese novels, watching K-Drama, and experiencing it first-hand, I think it’s safe for me to discuss the love language of Asian men. Or at least, most of them.
Usual Traits of Asian Men
Of course, this list does not apply to everyone, but there seems to be a commonality among Asian men. I have gathered this from first-hand observations and readings. This includes Filipino-Chinese guys.
They are not usually talkative, especially when they just met the person.
They listen to conversations around them closely. It helps them understand the people around them better.
Serious or unfriendly.
While they can be silly and have a good sense of humor in private, it’s usually only witnessed by a few people close to them.
Not very affectionate.
They are not the “touchy-feely” types. Have you noticed that in TV shows, Asian men usually have their hands on their sides or inside their pockets?
Can’t quite catch non-verbal cues.
In Chinese novels, they call these men “Low EQ”. They are smart and generous but cannot quite catch a woman’s drama.
Despite what they have achieved, traditional Asian men are hard workers. They pretty much prefer to be hands-on in business and in making decisions for their company.
Asian men are usually responsible and loyal to their spouses and families. They take marriage and commitment to heart.
A good provider.
They work hard because they want their families to have a good life. Additionally, they want to be able to send their children to good schools because they value education.
Question: What is the Love Language of Asian Men?
Have you dated or married an Asian man? I married one and am still happily married to him. He is a Filipino-Chinese but who is often mistaken as a Korean. Even Koreans greet him in their local language. haha
So after all these years of living with one, reading novels, watching TV shows, and movies, I have made a conclusion about the predominant love language of Asian men.
I think it is safe to say that they express love through service and gifts—in that order.
While Asian men are not verbally expressive of their feelings nor are they very affectionate, they show their love and concern through their actions.
How Crash Landing On You Exemplified Service
Crash Landing on You is about a South Korean fashion mogul and heiress who crash lands in North Korea after a cyclone. There she meets a North Korean military officer with whom she falls in love. It’s going to be a turbulent, tormented, and illegal love affair because of the sovereign concerns of their countries.
But during the times that the two main characters, Ri Jeong Hyeok (Hyun Bin) and Yoon Seri (Son Ye-jin) are together, we can see how Capt. Ri showed his devotion to Seri. There was even a point in the series where Seri introduced Jeong Hyeok to Ku Seung Jun (played by Kim Jung Hyun) as her “bodyguard.”
The two had to discuss what a bodyguard means with Seri saying, “But that’s what a bodyguard does.” Capt. Ri argues that he is just protecting her and keeping her safe. So well, that is precisely why I say Asian men show their love through service.
How Ri Jeong Hyeok “Served” Yoon Seri
Let me count the ways.
He made coffee for her.
She demanded for brewed coffee and Capt. Ri delivered. He bought coffee beans, roasted them himself, ground them, and made brewed coffee for Seri. Having a hangover that morning, she was so happy to wake up to the aroma of freshly brewed coffee.
It’s kind of like my husband. He wakes me up in the morning and tells me that my hot coffee is already on my desk. Yes, he wakes up before me to brew our morning coffee. Sometimes, he buys beans and grinds them himself. He used to have a manual grinder. Now he has shifted to a portable coffee grinder.
He provided her needs.
Asian men usually work hard to provide for the wife, the children, and the household. Most of the time, the woman doesn’t have to work but just stay pretty. However, in present circumstances that there’s women empowerment, the ladies have been educated and are earning from their jobs. Many have also started their businesses.
But still, it doesn’t stop the man from providing her needs. At lot of times, she gets to spend her earnings on herself.
He put himself in danger’s way.
Whatever the situation, he will put himself in between that and the woman he loves. Many times, Jeong Hyeok would move Seri to his side or behind him when there is something that might “threaten” her well-being. When we cross the street, hubby would hold my hand and put me on the “safe” side.
He is very thoughtful.
Asian men usually ask how their women are. Where they are, if they have eaten, if they have arrived safely, and many more. He also also calls whenever he goes to the supermarket because he doesn’t know what to buy. hahaha
He cooked for her.
When she first reached the military village, she ended up standing in front of Jeong Hyeok’s house. He saved her from getting nabbed by patrolling officers. The follow day, he made fresh noodles and cooked noodle soup for her.
He says he is fine, no matter his situation.
When he is tired, sick, or whatever and I would asked him how he is, hubby would tell me he is fine. Isn’t that what Jeong Hyeok always tells Seri even though he is full of bruises and scars? And it peeves the woman but makes her feel secure that her man is strong. weeeeeee
He brings the umbrella.
When it rains, it’s usually the guy who brings and holds the umbrella. I remember this one time that hubby picked me up from an errand. Since I don’t drive, he willingly drives me everywhere.
One time, it was raining so hard. Hubby parked in front of the store, got an umbrella, and walked towards me. He put his arms around me and we hurriedly walked under the umbrella towards the car. Those few seconds made my heart skipped several beats. Hihihi You felt it, too, Seri, right?
He lets her get her way.
Even when Seri misunderstands Jeong Hyeok, like when she said he is bad with directions at the border, he still said yes. Many times, hubby does that to me, too. And then I would see the twinkle in his eye telling me that he knows the truth but he lets it slide. Of course, these are not serious compromising moments. Like when he catches me shopping online. Hahahaha
He humors her.
Even when Seri seems to be doing stupid things, Jeong Hyeok lets it slide and doesn’t make fun of her. It’s a lot like hubby, too. Hahaha
He likes to be needed.
The Alpha-male instinct is not just among men. Being the man of the house ignites the Alpha male instinct. No matter how strong, smart, and accomplished you are, at the end of the day, you go home and let him be your man.
Their comforting hugs work both ways—it gives you peace and security that you can rely on somebody. Meanwhile, it also makes them feel good to be needed. Right, Jeong Hyeok?
The Suplado | Reserved | Introvert Look Makes Them More Adorable
Asian men predominantly seem unapproachable, but that’s what makes them more adorable and endearing. And once you break the ice, you will find them very loyal, trustworthy, and responsible.
But still, just manage your expectations when you are already married, okay? hehe
Now you know why Asian women are usually spoiled and many are bratty. And now you also know why I am still madly in love with my Fil-Chi Oppa! hahahah
Other Relationship Stories
Meanwhile, here are other marriage and relationship stories in this blog. Just click on the link below:
- Dan and Sheann: When God Sets the Stage for Your Love Story
- Jayvee and Dawn: God’s Perfect Timing for a Dream Wedding
- CBTL: Mondays Made Better With You
- Stylist Alee Benson Finds True Love and Eternal Life
- To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before
- Praying for a Spouse and Getting Exactly What You Asked For
- The Couples’ Game that Made Us Question Our Marriage